February 19th, 2010 — Wordman
The life-altering news is apparently not new, but I only learned of it last night, when my wife returned from a routine run to Target. She said nothing, only smiled, reaching into a environmentally irresponsible plastic bag. From the bag she pulled pure joy, and then the incredible message was clear: Arnott’s Biscuits, the Australian cookie maker, now distributes (through Pepperidge Farm and Target) Tim Tam cookies in America.
Let me say this again: you can now buy Tim Tams at Target.
Some readers may not appreciate the importance of this news. Perhaps they have never been in an international airport in Australia and witnessed the stores containing nothing but Tim Tam cookies, and watched as visitors buy cases of them for their return home, or open their large carry-on bag to reveal only an empty void they then fill to the brim with Tim Tams. Perhaps they have seen this, but never have done a Tim Tam slam with tea, coffee or hot chocolate so don’t know what all the fuss is about.
On the other hand, maybe you do know about Tim Tams, but think the American versions are inferior. All I know is that even if that is true, the American versions still induce involuntary biological reactions. I had nearly repressed the memory of Tim Tams to avoid the pain of not being able to get them locally.
Repress no more.