Nerdcore challenge

February 28th, 2008 — Wordman

I got on a nerdcore kick a few months back, and have been unable to exorcise several songs from looping in my head (particularly Rock Out With Your Hawk Out, Nursehellamentary and Mountain Kind). This genre has fallen off the radar a bit, it seems to me, but several films are about to be released about it, so maybe it’s on the upswing.

Like anything else, nerdcore obeys Sturgeon’s Law, so much of it sucks. It’s been around long enough that the creme has risen to the top by now. One of its flaws is the same geekier-than-thou theme over and over, mostly to really bad beats. Tracks that are actually about something are usually more interesting.

For a very brief moment, I caught the bug that makes someone want to try to do this, but I don’t really have the talent or the time. Maybe someday. Meanwhile, a bunch of random ideas for songs floated through my head, so I thought I might as well mention them and challenge any passing nerdcore artists to see what they can do with them:

  • Some sort of ranting, hardcore blasting of Uwe Boll. He really needs to be stopped before he does more damage to our collective psyche.
  • At various points in history, some scientist comes along with a theory that completely overturns the conventional wisdom. Songs are needed in the first person where such a scientist disses and degrades the conventional wisdom and its inventor. Bonus points if all the references are contemporary to when the scientist lived (e.g. muskets instead of 9mm).
  • Retro video games make constant appearances in nerdcore, but I have yet to hear a track dedicated to the massive time sink that is Civilization. It would probably be called “Just One More Turn”.
  • “Confession of a Tentacle”, from the point of view of an anime tentacle.
  • “Golden”, about φ.
  • You could do a whole album on Beastmaster.
  • “Identify 9”, a tribute to Wizardry cheat codes.
  • “E-mail Tourette’s”

By the way, you can add Optimus Rhyme to the list of perfect names.